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As parents, we want the best for our children. We want them to learn quickly, to be a good friend, to have good friends, to overcome their fears and make a difference in the world. With unconditional love that’s difficult to express, we just want so deeply for our little ones to be truly happy.

We see their remarkable potential and want to help them fulfill it. Yet somehow, despite the very best of intentions, our help often doesn’t seem to be as helpful as we hoped…

Does this sound familiar? Perhaps you or someone you know has a strong-willed little one with his own agenda. He simply will not do anything against his will–and it seems that many of the good things his sincere parents want for him is against his will. How can we as parents still be a part of our children’s journey while respecting their agency? Child-led, parent-guided progression may be a helpful approach to try out. Here are 3 keys to child-led, parent-guided learning: 

1. Provide options and let the child choose. 
2. Respect the child’s decision. 
3. Respect the child’s timing.

Provide Options

Children thrive in environments where they feel safe and trusted. When we provide options, we can generally limit those options without causing the child to feel limited. Allowing him to choose respects his agency. It helps him feel safe (because he gets to choose what’s most comfortable for him) and trusted (because letting him choose shows belief that he’ll make a good choice). It may also be helpful to look for opportunities when it may be appropriate to provide your child with a less desirable option that has an unpleasant consequence–one you can live with and that won’t cause deep or lasting harm. This is a simple way to create a safe, trusting environment in which children can thrive.

Respect the Child’s Decision

Serving as a sounding board as children make their own choices will help them learn about the connection between choices and results. At times, this may help them think long-term and avoid undesirable outcomes. Other times, it may be necessary to allow the child to experience those outcomes for himself.

It’s natural to want to shield our children from pain and disappointment, but letting them experience the consequences of poor choices in a safe, controlled environment gives them the chance to learn by experience, which can further validate the lessons you are teaching. It is better that they learn from their mistakes now while they are young and the consequences aren’t as expensive, long-lasting, or painful.

You may even find that sometimes, after trying out different options, your child will come to the decision you hoped he would. The difference is that he’s far more inclined to share your perspective in the future if you give him the space to think for himself now. Efforts to control tend to damage relationships and push children in the opposite direction we are trying to lead them. Respecting their choices shows them they are safe to want something different and that we trust them to want something good.

Respect the Child’s Timing

No two children progress at an identical rate. This is true for physical, mental, and emotional developments. Some things are skills that are learned over time, but some are things beyond the child’s control. Though a youth may increase his speed by learning appropriate running form and other helpful tricks, he cannot control his height and the effect it has on this skill.

Children are incredibly in-tune with themselves. They often know far better than we do of their own readiness or lack thereof. Encouragement and support enhance a child’s progress far more than insistence or force. He wants to succeed. Interfering with the natural timing of his growth unintentionally indicates that he is not improving fast enough. The resulting pressure and disappointment compound over time and can result in greater resistance in the future. However, if he is allowed the time and space to try when he is ready, we will often find that his learning curve will steepen as his experience and confidence increase.

Please keep in mind that it is impossible to account for every scenario. Child-led, parent-guided progression is not a “one-size fits all” solution. However, we hope that this approach will add to your parenting tool belt and aid you in increasing your parent-child relationship. Providing options, respecting choices, and respecting timing can help create the safe environment in which children thrive.

At Harmony Arts, WE LOVE DRUMMING! Especially when we can drum with friends on our authentic African Djembes!

Check out these fun pictures from a Drum Circle we had at the Athenian Academy…

DESCRIPTION: Great for kids, attend as a FAMILY, or, make it a DATE!!! (Ask about our family rate.) Have fun improving rhythm skills and focus! Enjoy rhythm, cooperation and ensemble skills with a group of friends. Explore different drums and styles, improvise, and build coordination! Enjoy drumming with a community of drummers! Also, there is a Box Elder County Fair Parade performance opportunity! 60-minute class.

Students do not need to own their own drum, but drums are available for purchase if you desire one. All our drums are hand-made from authentic materials from Africa, and proceeds from their purchase help build and equip schools in the villages they are made in.

Come and join us! See CLASS INFO>CLASS DESCRIPTIONS for dates and times.

Photo credit: All Things ShelleyRachelle

We are so excited to have Stephanie DeFilippis on board as our new Art Teacher! She has some FUN things planned for our summer art classes, “Stroke of Paint!”

Enrollment is available (until it’s full!!) for children, teens, and adults.

You can attend a single class, or, add as many more classes as you like for only $5 per student, per class!

Come as an individual, or as a family (call/text 435-452-2697 for family rate), or, enjoy the class together with a DATE, parent-child date, or with a friend!

REGISTER HERE: http://www.harmonyarts.net/class-descriptions/

DESCRIPTION: Paint, paint, paint! Complete several pieces (one piece per class, with a possible second piece) and enjoy a more in-depth opportunity to hone your painting skills. Working with acrylic paints, we will explore, learn and create in a safe and fun environment while making new friendships! Enjoy meeting and observing a local artist. ARTISTS KIT (see below) INCLUDED!

FORMAT: 90-min class

MATERIALS INCLUDED: Artist’s Kit includes…
… 3 different brushes,
… heavyweight, 30-page, 9 X 12 pad,
… 1 canvas,
… 7 bottles of acrylic paint.
This kit will last you through the summer!

See this fun time-lapse video of Miss Stephanie doing a project!

Here are the projects we will be doing…

MONDAY, JULY 13 … 2:00-3:30pm – WATERMELON and/or MIDNIGHT MOUNTAIN LAKE

MONDAY, JULY 13 … 4:00-5:30pm – CUPCAKE and/or AMERICAN FLAG SKY

MONDAY, JULY 13 … 6:00-7:30pm – AMERICAN FLAG SKY and/or PARENT-CHILD BEARS

TUESDAY, JULY 28 … 9:00-10:30am – CUPCAKE, and/or, A FRIEND IN NEED

TUESDAY, JULY 28 … 6:00-7:30pm – PINEAPPLE and/or DAISY

THURSDAY, JULY 30 … 2:00-3:30pm – CRAB and/or OCTOPUS

THURSDAY, JULY 30 … 4:00-5:30pm – ROCKET and/or HULK HAND

THURSDAY, JULY 30 … 6:00-7:30pm – SEASONS TREE and/or A FRIEND IN NEED

Kierste Carter keeps the books running smoothly for us here at Harmony Arts. It is her friendly voice on the other end of the phone when you have billing questions.

We appreciate Kierste’s dependability, her willingness and creativity for solving problems, and her encouragement to us in providing a sounding board for ideas. Many good things that have been done in the studio have come about because of her input. Kierste is a team player and she works very hard to make sure things are done to the best of her ability.  We are all so grateful for her.

Kierste earned her Bachelor’s degree from USU, majoring in Family, Consumer and Human Development with an emphasis in Family Finance (financial counseling and education). Prior to working for Harmony Arts, Kierste worked for Intermountain Healthcare as a Patient Service Representative, where she also did billing, coding, audits, and processed financial assistance applications. Kierste is married to Trent Carter and they are the parents of three boys.

Kierste, Thanks for everything you do for us here at Harmony Arts!

By Shelby Hansen

We’ve all been there. Dreaded practice time. Your kids or even you went kicking and screaming, literally or figuratively, to practice. 

I was the prime example of this. I had been in piano lessons for a little over two years and I hit the infamous rut in the learning curve. I knew enough to play, but not enough to sight read or play really well. I firmly believed that piano was a waste of time. As a 10 year old, obviously I didn’t really know what I was talking about. I would sit down at the piano and play songs I knew really well instead of the new material and goof around until my dreaded 15 minute time period was over. The problem was that I wasn’t getting any better at piano, and I hated it because I wasn’t making progress. Here are a few ideas that I have implemented since then to make my practice a success.

Idea 1: Reward rather than Punish

Instead of taking away things, promote positivity by giving rather than taking. I’m not saying buy your kid a car if he plays for a week, but do choose reasonable rewards and fulfill them. For example, if he had a week of dedicated 15 minute a day practice, you could go get an ice-cream cone together. If we reward more, your kid will more likely want to play, plus he will progress in his piece and as a musician.

Idea 2: Set a Reasonable Goal for Practice

Goals are so important. They keep us motivated, and they bring a sense of accomplishment and pride. His teacher will usually help him set weekly goals, but your job as a parent is to help him manage daily goals that will keep him motivated to practice. For example: 15 minutes of practice 4 days a week. Practicing regularly will keep him moving forward and continuing to enjoy his instrument.

Idea 3: Try to Keep a Regular Playing Time

Try to practice at the same time everyday. In my family, we will have a 30 minute break after school and then we practice. Try having your musician grab a snack and watch his favorite show and then practice. He is already exhausted from school and may need a minute to let his patience fill back up. Waiting until later in the day is often harder as activities usually happen later. Be flexible! Find a time that works for you and your child.

Idea 4: Start with New Material

New material is hard and it can be really hard for a student to stay motivated. An idea is to do the warm up then start with new material and learn it. Then, have your child play his favorite song at the end. Who knows? Maybe he’ll find a new piece he loves to play.

Idea 5: Be His Biggest Fan

Always encourage your child and point out good things that he did. Learning an instrument is hard. It sometimes will feel like an uphill battle, but in the end, it is worth it. If you hear something you like, then clap. He’ll feel good and want to continue. Sometimes just sit and listen for a minute to show that you care about him and his progress. This can also help with performance anxiety. Don’t be overbearing, though. Give him space to express himself and have fun.

I hope this helps you and your child. Happy practicing!

Right now we’re all experiencing some upheaval because of COVID-19. With changes in school, routines, and activities, children can become anxious — even afraid they are in danger. In times like these, music can be a great strength.

Stories and songs about great people and events from the past and present can comfort and inspire us and our children. Pull your kids close and use songs and stories about our land and people to give them hope, a sense of belonging, and a greater purpose. For more on this topic, we love the following article written in the wake of 9/11:

In Times of Tragedy …

The events of September 11, 2001 will long be remembered as a day pivotal to world and American history. The final outcome of this day, however, has yet to be determined, and teachers and parents are hearing advice — important advice — about how to care for children during these turbulent times. Many of us are working to establish stronger links with one another — simply because we need the love and security that family and friends provide. 

In considering how we might establish a more secure environment for our children, we can turn to what we know to be most basic about childhood development. We know that children make connections to their world based upon the bond that exists between the child and primary caregiver. Thus, it is a time for emphasizing family ties, especially those one-on-one relationships that thrive within the immediate family. Through the ages, music has been used to enhance family bonds; so now is a time to sing and hold our children close, using music’s power to comfort and console. We also know that children need order in their lives. This includes times of daily quiet that feature rest or relaxation with very little chatter or activity. Listening to soothing music during this time will provide a nonverbal reminder of the beauty and order that exist in our world. 

We can also talk to children in a need-to-know manner, discussing issues according to what the child is asking. This does not mean glossing over our children’s questions, but it also does not mean giving them details that they are not seeking. Notably, talking to children is much preferred to having a television commentator explain to your children how you (or they) are feeling. In considering television use, experts advise that preschool children not see any disturbing news reports and that primary-aged children only view such reports with a caring adult and on a very limited basis. September 11’s horrific and baffling pictures greatly affected the psyche of us all, with the impact on children being especially detrimental. By contrast, the conversations parents and teachers have with children can be designed to be calming and reassuring. 

Finally, it is important for children to realize that they are part of a larger world and that there are many good people in their world. Patriotic songs express a connection between the self and a larger body, while often conveying a common ideal. This might help explain some of the emotions felt when singing such songs — or when hearing stories about the courageous actions of men and women. Such stories and songs are what epics are made of and are central to the storytelling process of days gone by. Through song and story, children learned about the greatness of their ancestors and pondered their own place in their communities. Perhaps it is time to retell such stories and to craft new stories that will inspire today’s children. 

Children are moved by events both tragic and heroic, by deeds both great and small, and they need to find expression for such thoughts and feelings. We can set a good example for our children by telling heroic stories of our own (representing our own families, communities, and beyond) and by singing and making us songs that convey what words alone cannot express. Music can help our children — and us– through these times. Keep the songs and stories coming!

— Early Childhood Connections, Foundation for Music-Based Learning, Greensboro, NC, published in the Fall 2001 ECC Leadership Bulletin and authorized for photocopy and redistribution. 

Makala has been playing the guitar for 8 years. She has played guitar in the Bear River High School jazz band for four years this year. Along with playing the guitar, Makala loves dancing, teaching, and learning new things. Makala is excited to be part of the Harmony Arts and Music Academy team and we are so excited to have her! Click this link to watch a video of Mikala on guitar! https://m.youtube.com/watch?feature=youtu.be&v=qn3KfwBmq-A

When we learn an instrument, we need to know we are making progress! That’s what keeps us motivated. If we feel like we are not making progress, there goes our motivation! This is why it is so important to have a clear and accurate picture of our progress.

Often the problem is our expectation of what progress looks like. Mistakenly, many of us think that progress is a steady uphill climb — but that is rarely what it looks like, especially when playing an instrument. This causes a problem for many learners because as long as things are going in the direction they expect, they stay excited and motivated. But as soon as we regress a bit or hit a plateau, we often feel that all is lost and then we start listening to the negativity in our head that tells us a myriad of half truths and even lies about our own ability.  So let’s take a look at what progress really does look like.

Using a MIDI software so that progress can be seen in numbers has been a great tool for our students and teachers.  Let me share Becca’s experience from the other day…

Becca sat down at the piano-laptop and played a piece, Old German Dance, for the first time with the software. She received a score of 45% accuracy (this was after practicing the song at home, without the software, for at least a week, so she really knew it pretty well.) Keep in mind, playing with software like this requires you to be absolutely accurate in not only note and rhythm accuracy, but also in playing an exactly accurate tempo. It takes time and practice with the software before you even gain the skill of just playing right in time with it, so students who haven’t used the software a lot will score lower until they master that skill. (This doesn’t particularly bother me because we watch the numbers as they go up and it’s fun to watch that progress and know that you’re getting better!  Doesn’t really matter where you start, and THAT’S an important truth to accept when you’re learning, that we all start at a different place.) So, I asked her to write her score on a sticky note…45%.

Next, I asked her to play it again and write her 2nd score down…53%. It is exciting to see that simply by playing the piece a second time she increased her score by 7%! You might not expect any improvement simply from just playing it a second time, without any spot practice of any kind before assessing again. I find it interesting that students typically do not measure their own progress accurately. They think they are not improving, but that is simply not the case. It’s nice to be able to see this progress in numbers, since we are often not an accurate judge of our own improvement.

When Becca showed me her second score, she was excited, and so I asked her to go back to the laptop-piano and keep playing it over and over (straight through — not always the best way to practice — but remember, she had already somewhat learned the piece). I directed her to write down EVERY score, until she either got a score she was happy with, or, felt frustrated and needed help. The next time I saw Becca was when she brought the above sticky note pictured, and had received 100%.  She was all smiles! Of course we cheered and celebrated, then we plotted the scores on a graph and analyzed what really happened.

Notice how her scores only went up a few times, NOT every time she played it.  We discussed that if this had been a NEW piece, there would have been more plateaus and more frequent drops, resulting in slower progress, so it would be important to look at the WHOLE picture, not just what is happening now.  I asked Becca how she felt when she experienced a score drop? She said, “I wanted to do it again!” I had a similar experience with a teenager recently. When I asked her the same question, she said, “I was mad and wondered what was wrong with me?!”  Whaaaat? Seems like the older we get, the more we are tempted to doubt our ability. Sad. It made me wonder how many times a student quits, right before they were going to make a breakthrough. After that discouraging 74%, it only took ONE MORE TRY for Becca to get 100%.  ONE. MORE. TRY.  

So, WHAT IS THE KEY?  What truly determines whether or not someone learns an instrument is really just one thing…

Be willing to give it ONE MORE TRY.  Always. And if you need a break, take one.  If you have a bad day, chalk it up to experience and life. But get back on the horse, every time you fall off. 

The older I get, the more perspective I have, and it is really something to look back on experiences with the eye of experience.  So many times I worried about details, felt overwhelmed, or doubted my ability, when really ALL that was needed was just to give it ONE MORE TRY.  

Of course we still want to be creative in our problem-solving.  We still want to learn what we can and be open to making adjustments in our approach to progress.  We live in an amazing time with many creative solutions to our problems. But it is so very important to take time to pat ourselves, and our students, on the back just for hanging in there.  The most important success to measure, is the success of our willingness to work at it and give it ONE MORE TRY. Celebrate THAT victory, and you WILL find progress.

Thank you, Becca, and all my students, for teaching me.  Once again I am improved by knowing YOU.

— by Nan Croney

Learning to play music has much to offer individuals–from simple, everyday things (like learning to break down big goals into little ones) to scientific things (like increasing the speed at which neurological pathways are formed in our brains). Aside from what music has to offer individuals, what are the benefits of engaging in music activities as a group? Today we find out!

Have you ever heard of oxytocin? It’s a chemical in our brains that correlates with long-term happiness. More oxytocin means more joy–not a fleeting moment of pleasure, but a true enjoyment of living.

But what does this have to do with music groups? EVERYTHING! You see, oxytocin is released by developing safe, deep, lasting relationships. (All types, including simple friendships.) Want to know a good way to nurture a relationship? You got it! Music. Singing, dancing, drumming, and playing musical games together capitalize on the psychology of group participation. As human beings, we have a need to belong and feel appreciated. That’s exactly what groups offer: belonging and appreciation. Music groups can also positively influence correct and uplifting beliefs about practicing and performing in a subtle yet influential way.

Enjoying music together–especially creating music together–is a great way to put two love languages into action that increase oxytocin: quality time and physical touch. The physical touch can be as simple as dancing with a partner, high-fiving someone who just tried something new, or even cuddling a child while singing softly in her ear. The “quality” in “quality time” comes from undivided attention. Putting away distractions (including mental ones) helps us focus our attention on others so our time spent together is of the highest quality. Five minutes of high-quality time spent with others has a far greater influence than twenty minutes of split attention.

In addition to long-term happiness, enjoying music in a group can also release dopamine: the chemical responsible for immediate pleasure. In moderate amounts, that’s a GREAT thing! It’s the excitement of accomplishing a goal, the reward of a congratulatory applause, the satisfaction of recognition. Music groups help us feel our progress emotionally, which encourages us to keep doing the hard or monotonous things required for continued growth.

It’s the release of dopamine, like a high-carb snack before a sports game, that gives us a burst of energy in a moment of need. But just as we need a well-balanced diet, we need well-balanced chemicals–and just as carbohydrates should only make up a small portion of our diet, dopamine is healthiest in small doses.

Oxytocin takes time to build up, much like the steadiness of the rising sun, versus dopamine, which is like flipping on the lightswitch. For true happiness, we must be patient so that the oxytocin can be released. If the first day with a music group doesn’t seem to have immediate results, that doesn’t mean it’s not for you. Be patient! Be active! PARTICIPATE! Over time, you will see the results: belonging, appreciation, meaningful relationships, and with those, the release of oxytocin, resulting in a deep-rooted happiness you just can’t describe.

Music alone is fun and full of potential. Music with a group can be life-changing!

by Maree Zollinger

It’s a happy day!  You are about to attend your first music lesson and you are excited and filled with hope and anticipation!  You have a goal, you want to be able to make music, and you are looking forward to the day when you can.  You know you will need to work hard – you are OK with that. So you show up to your first lesson and leave with some things to practice and learn, and you are MOTIVATED!

Now, jump ahead a few months, or weeks, or even days.  You’ve seen the scenario. Now, your attitude is not quite as spunky and hopeful as it was.  You’ve experienced some opposition and found that this is going to be harder than you thought.  Maybe you are even questioning whether you really want to do this…?

Guess what?  Truth: MUSIC IS FUN WHEN YOU CAN ACTUALLY DO IT WELL!  

Truth:  Few musicians love playing a piece when they can’t play it well – when they are still in the early learning stages.  

Truth:  When you can’t play a piece yet, it’s hard, and frustrating, and your rendition of the piece does NOT match the sound you pictured in your head.  Ugh.

But how can you “actually do it” (play music well) when you are just a beginner, or just learning a new piece?  You are not yet able to play like a pro, and this lack of fun is sapping your energy and, therefore, your motivation.  

This is how:  When you are learning something new, it is so important that you keep POSITIVE ENERGY flowing, otherwise, you will quit.  80% of piano students quit in the first two years – that is the national average in the U.S. WHAT?!?!?! How is this OK?!?!?  IT. IS. NOT. OKAY.  

So why do so many students quit?  Research tells us that the reason why students quit is because They Feel They Are Not Progressing.  This is why it is so important to keep positive energy flowing, by making and noting progress.

Parents! This is a great place for you to jump in with attention, rewards, and encouragement. When your child has a new piece of music to learn, capitalize on that novelty! Be excited about their new piece while they are still excited about it. Do what you can to help them learn it quickly so they get to the fun part!

The way you do this is by learning how to break a piece down into not only small daily goals, but very tiny “Minute Goals” (a goal you can get in a minute).  

The Process:  Take ONE measure, or however much you (or your child) can learn in one minute.  If you are studying piano, play the left hand first (because it lays the harmonic foundation for the right hand – it is the foundation for whatever else is there).  

1 – PATTERNS (intellectual memory).  Notice (maybe even write in the music) the patterns you see.  If you know music terminology and analysis, use that language.  If you don’t, it’s fine, just write what makes sense to you: ie) this note moves up; this is the same as measure 4; even drawing squiggles representing the shape is effective.

2 – PLAY (kinesthetic, visual, and aural memory).  Play this left hand passage over and over, allowing it to feel as easy and effortless as possible in your hand.  As you play, look at your hand playing it on the keyboard, and “memorize” what that looks like.  As you play, listen to how it sounds – what are all the parts and pieces of the sound – bass notes, filler, etc.  

THIS WHOLE PROCESS ONLY TAKES A FEW SECONDS when you get used to doing it.

3 – Do the same for the right hand.

4 – Put the hands together and repeat playing it over and over – thinking about the patterns while also feeling, looking, and hearing what you are doing.  BECAUSE YOU ONLY DID A VERY SMALL PORTION, you can do this quickly. (You can do anything hard for one minute!!!!)  And now … you love to play that part, and oh boy, do you ever sound awesome!!!!  

Now, your brain rationalizes that if you can learn one measure that quickly, and sound that great, and have that much fun, then you can do it for the whole piece, one measure at a time.  Do the math. At this rate, how many days will it take to play one page or even the whole piece?  The old adage is true: how do you eat an elephant – one bite at a time!

It’s a happy day!  You have been in lessons a while now and you just finished showing a friend what you can play.  They actually smiled, and so did you!  You feel pleased with your accomplishment – you are progressing and learning and just maybe, you can play that really awesome piece you want to play … someday.  But more importantly, you WANT to keep playing. Why? Because you are someone who sets and gets goals! You feel good inside sharing music with others, and this also motivates you and gives purpose to your efforts.  Your brain rationalizes – “I LOVE MUSIC!”